The Hand Grenade

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Dating back to the late 1990’s in the PEO/ASO industry there has been a rarely used but often talked about closing tool called the “Resume Close.” While actually using it would be a bit of a long shot, the concept behind it is very strong and worthy of consideration. If you ever DO use it, know that you are pretty much throwing your final hand grenade! It probably won’t work, but what have you got to lose if the deal seems otherwise dead? This could be modified for virtually any industry. Again, pay attention to the message behind the close.

Here’s the scenario. You’ve gone through the entire sales process with a prospect. You found genuine pain and your solutions are uniquely positioned to eliminate that pain, and then some. Your once seemingly interested prospect shuts down. He agrees with most everything you’ve presented but he’s just not going to move forward. Now what?

Throw the hand grenade!

“Sir, I guess I’m not here to try to sell you anything after all. I’m here to apply for a job. The pay I’m requesting is $12.00 an hour but that’s negotiable. (hourly cost of your  fees.)

Let me share with you my qualifications.

I have over 30 years of payroll processing experience (the collective experience of your Payroll team). I’ve processed payroll for companies ranging from new start-ups, to multi-state corporations with over 1000 employees. Out of what you pay me, I’ll process your payroll, print checks on check stock I’ll pay for and/or process direct deposits for your staff. I’ll pay all your payroll taxes, and if I ever make a mistake doing this, I’ll pay the IRS penalty out of my own pocket. I’ll provide you with whatever reports you wish each payroll or as dictated by you.

I also have over 30 years of experience in Workers Compensation and Workplace Safety (the collective experience of your Risk team). I’ve set up safety programs for industries ranging from heavy manufacturing to hospitals. Because I’ll be processing your payroll, I’ll be able to calculate your workers compensation premium to the penny each pay period and bill you accordingly. This will eliminate your ever making a deposit to start a policy or ever having to go through the audit process at the end of a policy year. I’ll provide you with one Million dollar coverage limits. I’ll set up a formal safety program in your company and ensure all employees know how to perform their jobs safely. And if an injury occurs, I’ll personally investigate the claim including paying a private investigator if I think the claim might be fraudulent. I’ll institute an early return to work program as needed to get injured employees back to work.

I also have over 30 years of Benefits Administration experience (the collective experience of your Benefits team). I’ve administered ERISA qualified employee benefit plans for business from one employee to over 1000 employees. I’ve worked with virtually all carriers and even helped craft Self-funded insurance plans for businesses of all sizes. I’ll ensure your benefits are administered in full compliance with all applicable laws and significantly reduce your Fiduciary Liability in offering these plans. I’ll also set up a Multi-Employer Plan 401k that will remove virtually all Fiduciary risk associated with sponsoring a 401k retirement plan. I’ll file your form 5500 and handle all the plan administration. I’ll even pay for the plan audit out of what you pay me.

Lastly, I have over 30 years of Human Resource experience (the collective experience of your HR team). I’ve earned the exclusive designation of “Senior Professional of Human Resources” and have led Human Resources departments in small business and large multi-national corporations. On day one I’ll create new employee files for all your employees. These files will be 100% compliant with the latest laws and regulations. Within the first 90 days I’ll put into place a customized employee Handbook and review all your formal policies and workplace postings. I’ll always ensure, in real time, that you are in full compliance with ALL applicable labor laws and if you are ever contacted by the Department of Labor or any other enforcing authority, I’ll be at your side to help handle it.

So, my question for you now is, who could you find that is more qualified than I am, and when would you like me to start?”

Onward & Upward!

Ben Hipps